Let’s start with the Oxford comma, shall we? My dear, lovely friend introduced me to that. It seems so natural to use it; how had I gotten by all those years before without it? Or her?

Of course, we studied linguistics together in college, so we both support generative grammar and somewhat discount or denounce prescriptive grammar. Humans, in the same vein of wonderful, scientific mystery where the ability to walk resides, seem to acquire language through these amazing and interesting biological processes. No other animal does this; no other animal has language.*

It’s off-putting when you can’t recall the dreams from the night before. It’s only just happened; the brain should easily remember what it just did.

I have a national park in my dreams that I visit. It has the most beautiful mountain. I hike here, overlooking a vast body of water that I’m guessing is an ocean. There’s a cliff and it’s sole purpose is to throw people off of it. I haven’t yet. I always lose the people I’m with when I’m hiking here.

Sometimes I make a small batch of brownies in a muffin tin. Breakfast of a mad mountain climber.

*Please don’t say apes or chimps learn, know, or possess language or the ability to acquire or even learn it. They learn words and, arguably, a crude mode of communication at best. They do not have the ability to acquire syntax. Yet. I mean, Jesus Christ, I believe in evolution.


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